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         Five baddies, who after a successful heist, spend the night hiding out in an abandoned warehouse to wait for the buyer to arrive in the morning. Two of the baddies know this warehouse as the place that was once thought to be used by their father as a porn studio. But as they settle themselves in, strange numbers begin to appear everywhere, and as the story progresses, we find that it wasn't porn daddy was filming. Now they have a big problem...they are not alone in the warehouse.

"My Father committed suicide. He put a plastic bag over his head and hung himself with his own belt."
                - Randy Hancock

         The first time I heard of this film was during an interview with Minneapolis based actress Rachel Grubb in 2007. (View the interview below) Upon first hearing of the project, there wasn't enough information to spark my interest so I put it in the back of my mind and continued with the daily grind of guts and gore here on The Farm. Fortunately, I was contacted by director Dav Kaufman previous to the world premier and was given a press pass. I was looking forward to attending... then I got my ass kicked.
         No no no... I didn't get into a bar fight or grab the wrong set of butt cheeks. A couple days before the world premier I was attempting to lift an extremely heavy (and expensive) bookshelf up the stairs when I lost my balance, fell backwards and the monstrous bookshelf landed square on my face. (My poor Stephen King books lost their only known home. *sniffle*) Thought it was impossible for J.P. Butchers decaying face to get any more heinous? Think again. I was forced to contact Dav with the bad news I couldn't attend. My face looked like a purple version of the StayPuft Marshmellow Man and I was floating on the clouds on pain meds. I was pissed.
         Dav was kind enough to throw me a screener shortly after the world premier. I sat in my office and watched in awe thinking, "Something this fantastic came out of Minneapolis?" I live 30 miles from Minneapolis, my band has played hundreds of shows in Minneapolis, I fuckin' love Minneapolis and I had absolutely no idea that we had such enormous talent here in the state of 10,000 lakes!

         If you're a fan of The Ring, 8MM, Saw or any film involving alot of guns... 13 Hours in a Warehouse is right up your alley. It incorporates many aspects from three major film genres... horror, thriller and action.
         Horror - Obviously large amounts of blood and grizzly deaths fit into this category and 13 Hours has plenty of it. The most memorable moment was a scene involving actor Paul Cram and his less-than-pleasant encounter with a toilet. Obviously, he has to take a shit and soon after we see him screaming in pain from something attacking him from inside the toilet. Once he manages to separate himself from the porcelain god, we witness two decaying, bloody hands grasp the corners of the bowl as the head of an extremely fucked up woman emerges. She continues to climb out of the toilet (which was well shot) to further attack the poor guy who is now bleeding profusely from his nether regions. Weapon of choice? The toilet seat, of course! She is soon joined by another mysterious, and equally fucked up, women with the look of murder in her eyes.
         Thriller - Dav Kaufman takes the definition if a thriller to a whole new level. First of all, the numbers 32369 begin popping up around the abandoned warehouse in a substance which looks like blood. The thieves take little notice until it keeps showing up in places where it shouldn't be. I, myself, was trying to figure out the meaning of the numbers as the film progressed and all I could come up with was 3 + 2 + 3 + 6 + 9 = 23. The number 23, or the 23 Enigma as some refer to it as, is the Discordian belief that all events are connected to the number 23. I'm sure this was intentionally done because in the end, the number 32369 really does tie all the events in the film together.
         The thriller aspect also comes into play because the creepy clues we are given through the film (rats hanging from small nooses, for example) continually build the thrill of not knowing exactly what is happening, but knowing when you do figure it out, it's going to be disturbing. Almost how the Saw films build the tension and confusion.
         Action - The main characters of the film are professional thieves and criminals. The first 10 minutes of the film are the planning and execution of a heist on an expensive art gallery. After success, the thieves retreat to the warehouse equipped with an arsenal of guns. Guns which are usually pointed at each other. Arguments rage and fingers are pointed as to who is the one who killed the thief in the bathroom. (Did I mention they kidnapped a woman? Well, they did and she is running free in the warehouse after one of the ghost-like women unchained her.) So yeah, action is a factor in the film as well.

         The acting is amazing. There isn't one person in the cast who annoyed me or proved they were incompetent as an actor. As most of you know, that doesn't happen with me alot. Bad actors (even one or two) can ruin an entire film for me. I guess that's all I can say on the acting. I won't single out one actor to talk about because they are all fantastic.

         Special effects are superb. The Special Makeup Effects were designed by Crist Ballas whose extensive credits include Batman & Robin, The 13th Warrior, and the Forbidden Kingdom with Jet Li and Jackie Chan. His skill definitely shows through in 13 Hours. I love the work on the ghostly women. Effects have been added to make them static and jumpy. As if they were being projected through an old television with the only program being white static. This was an effect that enhanced the effectiveness of the dead-like characters immensely.

         I'm giving 13 Hours in a Warehouse 9/10 stars. There is very little to complain about. I highly recommend this film to all horror/thriller and action fans. The ending is a shocker. It makes you say, "Awwwwwwww sheeeit" as if you suddenly transformed into Vanilla Ice. Information on DVD release will be posted as it becomes available. Pick up a copy!

Cast & Crew
   |   Pictures

          - The arrival at the warehouse scene was 71/2 script pages (4 mins) shot continuously without a single cut.

          - The Special Makeup Effects was designed by Crist Ballas whose extensive credits include Batman & Robin, The 13th Warrior, and the Forbidden Kingdom with Jet Li and Jackie Chan.

          - It was a total of five days between the time that writer/director Dāv Kaufman conceived the story and finished the first draft of the script.

          - Because of city fire codes, real fire could not be used in the warehouse. Most of the smoke and all of the flames were added later with computer animation.

          - During production, the pipes in the vacant warehouse cracked, raining down a fountain of shit on the cast and crew from one of the toilets on the second floor.

          - The bathroom scene took almost 6 hours to film. Actor Paul Cram (Craig Teller) had to lay perfectly still on the cold cement ground with his pants down for almost the entire 6 hours.

          - The 115-year-old building that the film was shot in has long thought to be haunted. In one of the scenes when actor Danny Salmen (Mike Hancock) is stalking actress Meisha Johnson (Jennifer Wilkins), a light-colored shadow appears through an open door of the room he’s in, and then disappears as he leaves the scene. The filmmakers didn’t notice this until they got into the editing studio. It, of course, was kept in the final cut of the film.



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